A new chapter

 

I am safe was the words I uttered just now at 7.30 pm at night I don’t need to climb into bed and hide anymore. I am safe I  can be myself and not mask, I am getting the help I need I don’t know if it’s the open letter, or surrendering to my circumstances that I can’t change and asking for help in ways that I don’t expect.

I still have all the usual bugbears but I finally feel safe in my home despite having a new support worker starting we see that this is normally a huge deal for me but we are seeing that people are more open to me and willing to help, I live in the lap of luxury but having people willing to help is amazing and working with me, not against me, is going to do my health wonders.

So I am grateful for the good people who work in this industry and can help change lives I went from independent to the family home through the mess that was the COVID lockdowns, medication misadventures, and seizures but now I am in this wonderful Sil house (supported independent accommodation).

So thank you to the people who have learned my name and my family’s name and my needs though they are, but not minimizing the fact that I have gone for independence to needing support, we should celebrate these people.

I am not always critical but I can finally relax and feel safe and sound in my home. 

I am also adding to this post as it's the next morning and I am finally getting some good sleep, I am still struggling with pain but it is a start and I have decided that as I  widen the focus of the blog I can be myself much more and start to ask questions and yes some of these question's are going to seem a little left field but I am hearing these topics mentioned time and time again, and have been interested in them and I am saying to my audience to do your own homework well on these topics I am going to do mine. So I look forward to seeing where the Blog goes in being able to reach a wider audience YouTube and podcasts are going to remain disability focused but the blog is going to be a place where I can explore these issues and questions and some are biblical questions that have geopolitical implications today as well, and I want an acknowledge that there has been an amazing level of support for me online and in real life about the blogging so if you wanted to support me I am on Patreon and substack,  and I am getting real about life and simply I think growing up, it doesn't mean losing my sense of humour or needing less paid support but it means that I am being more assertive and learning what I want to learn, and coming back to god has been a step in the right direction, I am still very scattered and directionless but as I come back into a relationship with him I am sure he will open the right doors for me, and even close ones that need to be closed.