Life upate and tought lessons learnt

  I am writing this on a Saturday, and I am getting used to the weather and changing my routine Given that I can’t drive I am reliant on others to drive me or to have workarounds such as public transport or taxis.  I am also grateful for people who will despite working long days listen to me or take me home or go walking with me as I make the effort to be a better person as I haven’t for a long time been my best self. I have been trying recently to defend my connection with others despite this being a challenge for me to connect with others.

I do have a struggle with what is appropriate and what is an excuse vs what is a reason for me to need support and it’s a challenge that I didn’t realize until I started doing some background reading for this post to be aware that it’s a challenge for people, who also live with disabilities and being higher functioning to be able to accept the help.  It reduces the burden on the family as well, it’s just a question of how to use the support you are given, do you use a support worker and how do you go with an agency or independent as both have good and bad factors or do you use community-based supports like a day centre.

But I do live with other people, so this is a great thing that I am not as socially isolated as I used to be, but the past couple of months have taught me a few things and this is more the practical side of things as well.

Living on a budget is something that everyone does and it’s not as limiting as people think it is, it is quite freeing, for it,  helps you to see where you are wasting money and where just a little bit of creative thinking can go along way such as instead of going out to a restaurant, painting at home or doing a bring a plate in a park and I know that in Australia we have gold coin operated  BBQ’s in parks and when it’s bush fire season some councils take the gas away. But it’s an option and one that I know people use quite a bit and it’s something that they are kept reasonably clean as well.

Also, there is no shame in saying I can’t afford it and suggesting alternatives it’s something to be aware of that people have different fiscal bandwidths, and making finance work is important for people at times to be able to work with others. I think in a relationship especially a romantic one it's important to have conversations around money goals to be on the same page, as well as people with different backgrounds will have different views on money.

 

That if you want healthy relationships you need to put in the work and reach out to people and sometimes that means shutting up and not getting involved in the politics, of the group, if you can’t afford to do something speak up and suggest alternatives.  

But one thing I have discovered, and I think that this has become a bigger thing since 2008 a covid is that in some household and food products paying for a name brand is a waste of time, but in some food products it’s worth it.  

So, there are a couple of things that I have started doing to save some money as I want to travel, is I am not buying clothing or buying second-hand, I am also going over to reusable menstrual products.  I am also going over to buy my cleaning products at the discount store, in Aus this is the reject shop or Silly Sollies.

I have also started an herb garden and this being in disability accommodation is great for the others in the house, I am also going into a community centre to practice social skills in a “safe and supported environment. “This means different things to different people but for me, it’s being able to learn to wait my turn, being able to explore theatre skills and to create craft as well, as helping the support workers help others to practice speaking and articulating their needs and working to help them respect their privacy.

I am also learning to meal prep and to only buy what I need in the way of groceries as well. It seems basic when I am putting it down on paper but when I am seeing it written down it makes sense to me, I did talk in another post about support workers ( younger ones ) not having a lot of common sense but I now realize that common sense isn’t taught that much anymore and because of child and disability protection laws that are needed at times, we see that people are afraid and to be alone around people under 18 and this is sadly needed but it was the youth groups and teachers that allied with parents to reinforce what we consider common sense, such as apologizing and meaning it.

Doing your best on a test or exam and knowing that it’s important but not the be-all and end-all that there are other job pathways. That if you want something you need to work for it, and I want to travel next year so I am seeing where I can cut costs. I am also upskilling myself on the weekends to be able to do some part-time work, as I have been medically advised not to go back to what I used to do.

But in blogging and YouTube, I have learned a few key things.

·       Be careful about what you share about your personal life.

·       Don’t have mission drift.

·       Be able to accept constructive criticism.

·       Remember trolls might not have anything better to do.

·       Don’t feed them and don’t give them your power.

·       Understand that the internet is forever and the right to be deleted/forgotten hasn’t caught up in the internet age.

·       You never know what people have downloaded and how they are going to use it.

·       That people are going to have an opinion and don’t have the skills to say they don’t know enough about that topic to have an opinion on it.

 

But as I get back into the swing of a new routine, I hope to share more successes with my readers and viewers.